L. Annaeus Seneca, Epistulae Morales 3.2–3

Seneca writes to his friend Lucilius on the proper way to form a friendship. Drawing on the teaching of Theophrastus, he argues that judgment must come before affection, and that once a friend is chosen, nothing should be held back from him.

 

Tier 1

aliquem amīcum putās, sed tibi plūs crēdis quam illī, errās. nam vēram amīcitiam nōn intellegis. omnia cum amīcō tuō cōgitā, sed prīmum dē amīcō ipsō cōgitā. postquam amīcitiam incipis, amīcō tuō crēde; sed antequam amīcitiam incipis, amīcum iūdicā. multī hominēs male faciunt: prīmum amant, deinde iūdicant. melius est prīmum iūdicāre, deinde amāre. diū igitur cōgitā: vīsne hunc hominem in amīcitiam recipere? cum tibi placet, tum amīcum tōtō pectore admitte. tam audāciter cum amīcō tuō loquere quam tēcum loquī solēs.

 

omnia tibi ipsī dīcis. eadem verba etiam inimīcō tuō dīcere dēbēs. sed quaedam sunt quae hominēs cēlāre solent: hoc cōnsuētūdō facit. tū tamen omnēs cūrās et omnēs cōgitātiōnēs cum amīcō tuō miscē. amīcum tuum fidēlem habē; tum ille fidēlis fīet.

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